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Spaghetti and...Beanballs?

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Joined: 30 Jun 2008
Posts: 925
Location: Neverland

PostPosted: Fri Aug 07, 2009 9:34 pm
Post subject: Spaghetti and...Beanballs?
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Is meat too expensive? Is your favorite cut not available? Are you having some poncies over for dinner and you don’t know what to cook? Never fear, Spaghetti and Bean Balls are here! The Ultimate Vegan/Vegetarian alternative to Spaghetti and Meat Balls!

What must you do to obtain this savory, beantastic dish? First, you must go on a scavenger hunt all around the world(or the grocery store, if you’re a party pooper) and compile a collection of these choice ingredients:

4 cups Marinara Sauce(I put olives in my sauce)
½ pound whole wheat or regular spaghetti
1(20 ounce) can of Kidney Beans (not Kidneys, Mr. Lecter), rinsed and drained
2 tablespoons soy sauce(I use Low Sodium myself)
2 tablespoons streak sauce
2 tablespoons of olive oil(an some extra, for frying)
2 cloves of garlic, grated or minced finely(now don’t wine Dracula)
¼ teaspoon grated lemon zesty(extra zesty)
½ cup plain bread crumbs or oatmeal(preferred)
¼ cup vital wheat gluten(for extra chewyness)
½ teaspoon dried oregano(or chopped fresh if you’re herbtastic)
¼ teaspoon dried thyme(fresh if you’re extra herbtastic)

Bludgeon the Kidney beans with a potatoe masher until they’re no longer breathing, lifeless and beanlicious. Don’t completely deface them though, you still want to see some skins. Coat your dead beans with soy sauce, steak sauce, olive oil, garlic, lemon zest, bread crumbs(or oatmeal) wheat gluten, and herbs, and use a fork(of doom) to mix everything together. If you need to, use your hands to finish the deed, kneading the mixture together until firm.

Roll the bean mixture(of doom) into walnut sized balls(I use my cookie dough scooper). Preheat a large skillet over medium heat. Pour around ¼ cup of olive oil into the pan, then add your beanballs(I usually have to do half the first time, and the other half afterwards to avoid pan crowding). Make sure you brown all sides of the beanballs for ultimate beany goodness. After you’ve done your first batch, put your water on to boil. After they are all browned, add 1/3 cup marinara sauce(because I like extra sauce, I usually make an extra cup to add to the pan). Cook for an additional 15 minutes, and serve with your spaghetti.

Viola! Spifftastic Beanballs!
“To die would be an awfully big adventure.”
― J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
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